About Us: My Son’s View of His Autism


marci

This is one of my favorite pictures of my son at Walt Disney World one week after he was diagnosed as Autistic. This was during his Peter Pan phase.

Sunday is my day to talk about my family. Who we are, why we do the things we do or anything that is important in our life. I figure you spend part of your day reading about our life you should know a bit more who you are reading about.

On the ride home from Chicago last week my 13 year-old son and I had two hours of alone time when we had nothing else we could really do except talk. It was actually a really great time with him. We don’t talk much about his Autism because it is just part of him. But, there had been some questions in the back of my head that I had been wondering about.

I asked him “Do you hate being Autistic sometimes? Would you get rid of it if you could?” He told me sometimes wishes he wasn’t Autistic but not as much as he did when he was little. He believes it is his Autism that helps make him as smart as he is.

He was able to talk about how as he is growing older he is paying more attention to the details of people.  My son still doesn’t understand people’s emotions and what they are trying to convey to him sometimes with them. But, he said he can see why people do the things they do now or react the way they do to something. He is starting to see the “bigger picture” behind people’s actions because he studies them to figure out what they really mean when they speak to him.

He said he sometimes feels guilty saying he is Autistic because there are so many other kids that are more Autistic than he is. We finally talked about the levels of Autism and how he doesn’t need to feel guilty. The label just lets us get him some help in school for things that are difficult for him – organizational skills, understanding emotion, making friends, talking to people and social skills.  These are things that will help him as he gets older and needs them as he goes out in the world to work and live a full and productive life. It is okay to get the help because everyone has strengths and weaknesses.

Scar

One thing he said he likes about his Autism is that it is helping him become a better actor. Because he reads, a lot, and studies people he understands motivation and he is still getting accolades from people for his portrayal of Scar in The Lion King. One thing the director liked is that he didn’t strictly follow the movie version as most kids would have done but made it his own. She told him he should be on film because he captures the nuances of the character right down to his minor facial expressions that aren’t always seen on stage.  He has decided he loves villains and buddy characters in plays, movies and stories because they tend to be characters that are more richly thought out.

So for now he is sticking with his plan to become President by working his way through State offices and be an actor and restaurant owner on the side. He has big dreams.

 

27 Comments Add yours

  1. Pat Grattan says:

    That insight is so wonderful. Thank you both.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. koolaidmoms says:

      Thank you, Pat!

      Like

  2. Dom says:

    I vote for your son as president! Even if I am Italian. Great post!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. koolaidmoms says:

      Awe, thank you!

      Liked by 1 person

  3. spearfruit says:

    And big dreams he should have – I know he will accomplish many things in his life. A special son you have! 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    1. koolaidmoms says:

      Thank you so very much! It means a great deal.

      Liked by 1 person

  4. I love this post. Thank your son for sharing and thank you for posting it to share with us all!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. koolaidmoms says:

      Thank you! I always wondered how he felt but didn’t know how he would react to my questions. It was just the perfect time.

      Like

    1. koolaidmoms says:

      Thank you!

      Liked by 1 person

  5. oceanoffear says:

    This is really interesting to read about autism from your sons perspective. He sounds wonderful. I have to study autism in psychology where we mainly focus on the negatives so I love how you talked about his love of acting and how it helps him become the character Xx

    Liked by 1 person

    1. koolaidmoms says:

      We are working on having him use his love of acting to become a character who is positive (something he struggles with) and open to new experiences. We figure if he can create a character like that he can “try it on” when he needs it. We shall see if it works.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. oceanoffear says:

        Good luck!

        Liked by 1 person

  6. Christina Nifong says:

    So nice to “meet” your son! He reminds me of my son, who does not have an autism diagnosis but who is much more comfortable mastering facts than connecting with other humans. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    1. koolaidmoms says:

      Yes. He loves things to be black and white. Shades of gray perplex him. He has to figure out the percentage of correct information to make a decision. Lol.

      Liked by 1 person

  7. What a blessing to be able to have this kind of conversation! Special mom and son!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. koolaidmoms says:

      Thank you. It made me feel a bit better our choices.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. yes it is nice to hear what he thinks and feels! you are great parents for sure! xxx

        Liked by 1 person

  8. What an incredible son you have there! He does not allow any level of his particular Autism hamper his living life. Kudos Mom great job with this special boy. Mom of 5. xx Cheryl

    Liked by 1 person

  9. Tikeetha T says:

    I’ll vote for him! Great post!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. koolaidmoms says:

      Awe, thanks!

      Liked by 1 person

  10. It is wonderful that you two talk openly about it. I like the idea of creating a character for him to become when he feels the need to do so. I wish the both of you the best of luck as you learn together.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. koolaidmoms says:

      Thank you. His Autism is just part of who he is yet it effects so much of his life and ours that to not talk about it would deny a huge part of his life.

      Liked by 1 person

  11. What an inspiring boy! 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    1. koolaidmoms says:

      Thank you!

      Like

  12. Elizabeth says:

    One of my granddaughters is also autistic (Asperberger’s) and she has trouble recognizing and understanding the emotions of others. I think the fact that your son is so closely studying this in people is just wonderful!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. koolaidmoms says:

      Thank you. To him everyone else is like a giant science project. At least I think it is good he wants to understand.

      Liked by 1 person

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