Blending In and Letting Go


This what I am doing this morning. My daughter is on her final college tour before she starts to make her decisions. This school is at the bottom of her list of choices right now but we all felt she needed to take the tour and see how it felt for her.

So, I let her go. I don’t go on the tours with her. I go out to my car and try to blend in to the scenery. This is her decision and she knows what she needs to ask. If I have questions later that she cannot answer we can find out the answers. But, she needs to feel free to experience the schools on her own without my input or influence. She has to make the decisions about colleges, online schools, or work for herself.

I am letting go. Guiding, but not trying to influence. Who said parenting got easier the older the kids got? So much more seems to be at stake for them and by now I feel like I no longer should be influencing but coaching as needed. It’s hard to watch them flutter and fall as they take those first independent leaps but I know she will eventually soar no matter what she chooses.

20 Comments Add yours

    1. koolaidmoms says:

      It is. Next year will fly and then she will be gone.

      Liked by 1 person

  1. Elizabeth says:

    I found it SO much harder to let go than to parent when they were little! Even now I sometimes wish they were wrapped in my arms as newborns. Seeing them as adults making mistakes and raising their own families is tough! I have to bite my tongue so often. LOL They’re doing great but you know we moms always think we should run the show!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. koolaidmoms says:

      Lol! So true. She gets mad at me sometimes when I give my opinion (that she’s asked for) and she’ll say it’s because she knows I am right. 😉

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Elizabeth says:

        My boys will take my advice as long as I acknowledge that they’re grown men fully capable of deciding things themselves. With my help. lol

        Liked by 1 person

  2. Eartha says:

    What an exciting time for you both. I was naive in thinking that parenting would get easier as my girls got older. That’s not the case. I became a lot more anxious because they’re exposed to more as they get older, and a lot more protective. As they get older you have to guide them, but also know when to let go. They do sometimes like to make it clear that they’re not babies anymore. 🙂 I wish you both all the best.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. koolaidmoms says:

      Thank you so very much!

      Liked by 1 person

  3. My daughter is headed off to college this fall! Wow how time flies, I didn’t know your daughter was getting that close.

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  4. Aw so bitter sweet! My daughter is 2 and I am already dreading the day I become an empty nester 😦 But it is so wonderful to see them grow and succeed on their own!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. koolaidmoms says:

      It makes me feel good to watch her be able to make the tough choices but it will always be difficult to stand back.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. My daughter is very much an alpha, so I am sure there is lots of this in my future as she gets older

        Liked by 1 person

        1. koolaidmoms says:

          🙂

          Like

  5. elliebleu says:

    Such an important time in your lives. Hopefully she picks a college close to home 🙂 I can only say, that my time at college only made me closer with my mom because she did give me the freedom to grow on my own. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    1. koolaidmoms says:

      We are hoping she stays close by for the first two years but after that who knows. She has many choices to make over the next year.

      Liked by 1 person

    1. koolaidmoms says:

      Thank you, Lynn! Hug those babies! They grow too fast!

      Liked by 1 person

  6. So tough! Hang in there. She will make the right calls — and when she doesn’t, she will learn from them. We are right around the corner from this in our house!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. koolaidmoms says:

      Thank you!

      Like

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